Blind dating at Hawassa University: claims and denials

Nowadays, sexuality at most government universities is widely discussed in the public domain though this subject is taboo in the Ethiopian psyche. It is viewed taboo in most Ethiopian cultures. Sexuality is not discussed in public. It is widely believed that open discussion of sexuality with children within families will arouse their sexual drive. In most instances, the issue of sexuality are hidden. Accordingly, children particularly girls may grow up without the proper understanding of the subject. As a result of such traditional beliefs and sexual disorientation, perhaps not all sexual assaults, harassment, and intimidation which girls and women undergo are revealed. Relatively, rural women and girls are more vulnerable to this peril.

In contrast to rural women and girls, girls who are born and grown up in cities and towns are in a better position to know more about sexuality. They can have good exposures of the subject from multiple sources: from family background, student clubs at schools, from churches, mosques, from print and electronics media outlets, or on the internet. In fact, unless girls in cities are carefully protected by parents, they are more vulnerable due to the perils which urbanization breeds: shisha, chat, drug abuse, or other crimes.

So the gaps between rural and urban university girls to the said perils are significantly high. It is with such gaps that both rural and urban girls meet at universities to pursue their education. From day one of their arrival at universities, girls are expected to independently determine their destiny. Apart from academic challenges, university girls will obviously face multiple challenges both from within and outside the campus. Those who have had proper orientations from families will be well aware of the traps that are laid before them: chat, shisha, night clubs, blind dating or what have you. Those who are naive to such perils will be immersed very easily. Understandably, there can be exceptions to this assertion. But can they all succeed in overcoming the challenges facing them?

I have chosen to write on blind dating at Hawassa University: claims and denials. This is how the topic stirred my mind. Last weekend, I made travel to Hawassa. On my way back to Addis Ababa, on Sunday, 17 February, I deliberately preferred the Isuzu medium-sized bus for transportation. I sat in the front seat with a women and later we were joined by a young boy. As there was no common subject to start conversation, almost silence loomed perhaps for more than an hour. Perhaps most travelers who make journey by cross -country buses rarely find common topics that will interest them to start conversation thereby creating confidence among themselves. It is not unusual for silence to loom between two or among three travelers who are travelling to the same city sitting together. To avoid such incident, some may read books or others will tune to music on their FM radio receivers. Still others may chew chat.

Both of my acquaintances are from Hawassa University: Temesgen Mamo, boy, does not exceed 22. Temesgen was born and grew in Hawassa. Almaz, who is married and a mother of two is in her late 38s. She lives in Debre Zeit. Temesgen graduated from Hawassa University in Business Managment last year while Almaz attends her summer education in Mathematics. She is a fourth year student.

Having noticed the young conductor, who does not exceed perhaps, 15, picking chat, which was hung up next to the bus door, three of us stared at him, making chewing chat and its impact the topic of our conversation afterwards. I elicited the reaction of Temesgen that chat is common at almost all university campuses. Temesgen told me that the situation at Hawassa University with regard to chat, addiction, shisha, and blind dating are deteriorating.

According to him, many university girls are lured into sexuality this days. If you could go to night clubs, pensions and hotels, you find many university girls spending nights with men coming from Addis Ababa and elsewhere. Many men drive to the gate of the university to pick girls he said adding that girls from rural areas are more vulnerable to the trap. In his view, most pensions, night clubs, shisha and chat houses target university students. “I do not understand why university authorities ignore the matter, ” said Temesgen.

He added that even the kinds of musics played during nights at the university cafeteria seem to have lured students into night clubs, pensions, chat, shisha and pool houses, which are not far from university.

Asked what dragged girls into the aforementioned unsafe places, Temesgen said universities are learning institutions where girls and boys have joined for the first time to pursue their education. As teenagers, they are eager to experience everything their friends have told them they have experienced. So they are highly vulnerable to unsafe sex, pregnancy, HIV and AIDS and what have you. As they are far away from parents, they can be hoodwinked to go to night clubs, he said adding that the influence of friends is a grave concern.

Almaz also shares the views of Temesgen. She says campus students must observe university rules. According to her, she has seen girls at Hawassa campus wearing mini-skirts during nights and leave the campus, adding that perhaps they have disregarded their education. The university must protect them for they are young girls who have never had the exposure of overcoming the hazards of urbanization, she said.

A colleague at Hawassa University whom I talked to through telephone on the subject but sought anonymity said as he was dean of a certain faculty with the university, a woman had come to his office with complaints. Her daughter was a student at the faculty he was dean. The mother demanded the daughter transfer to other university or she would not let her daughter suffer. The mother told him she would take her daughter with her.

He told me that the student had not had academic problem. She was so outstanding. She had a GPA of 4:00 into two semesters of year one. But she was in critical condition while she was pursuing her education for failing to comply with the life style of her roommates. She was seen as “uncivilized” simply because she spent most of her time in the library. According to him, she faced difficult circumstances to pursue her education. Her roommates used to mock, ridicule and laugh at her whenever she returned from library. Due to the psychological trauma inflicted upon her due the persistent efforts of her roommates to drag her into carefree life styles, it so happened that her mother persisted either to transfer her to Addis Ababa University or to discontinue her university lessons from the university. Its public knowledge that many university girls are going for blind dating and making money with people coming from Addis Ababa, he said adding that the role of brokers in this regard are also high.

I raised the issue through telephone to Corporate Communication and Marketing Directorate Director, Melisew Dejenie with Hawassa University who is also Lecturer in Communication and Journalism. His response follows: “It is disappointing that the reputation of the university is damaged in this regard. This is conspiracy. It is illogical to conclude that the number of cars coming to the gate of university to pick girls have come for blind dating. In view of the growing student population at the university which currently stands above 30, 000 where female students account 20 per cent, it is not surprising if there are increasing number of vehicles coming to the university.”

According to Melisew, families and friends of students come to the university to visit them. Presuming that girls driven in such circumstances are going to wrong places are poor logic, he said adding, of late, a study conducted on prostitutes of Hawassa City revealed that most prostitutes disguise themselves in the name of university girls to the extent that some are bearing forged identity cards of the university. According to him, this is the reality and university students are labeled. And this kind of defamation hurts the feelings of our students, he said and went on as saying: “the opinions that are being disseminated are just opinions and they are not facts.” However, he says there might be handful of girls who are lured into the aforementioned places. Asked whether brokers operate, he says there might be brokers who are indulged in such activities.

With regard to the steps the university is taking to protect the safety of girls, the Director said raising the awareness of the students is the prime job of the university where enormous educative programmes are being broadcast on community radio of the university. He added that the university has also agreed to work with Fana Broadcasting Corporate.

With regard to the expansion of chat and shisha houses around the university, both the university and the Eastern Police Station took action against chat and shisha houses two years ago. He said that those places are shut down.

Endale Tesfaye Gender Officer of Gender Mainstreaming and Benefit Core Process with Hawassa University says the problem exists. He explains: first, as university students are above eighteen, he says the university cannot impose restriction on their right to go this or that place. “We cannot deprive of their right to go to this or that place during just break time, of course. However, during class time, we are working with the university community to ensure that students are in attendance.

The other point he raised is that girls at university are entitled to go anywhere they like, he said adding this is their individual and human rights. “The university does not also have the mandate to violate the right of students to move from place to place. Doing so will violate both individual and human rights. So the claims that university girls are going this or that place must be viewed in human rights perspective, ” he stated.

Endale also raised a point saying if sexual assault or harassment is inflicted on girls against their will, and if it is substantiated by evidence, then the university will file legal proceedings. However, he added, the university has carried out enormous awareness creation activities, among others, conducting girls forum on gender issues, disseminating various brochures and on gender -related issues: violence against women and sexual assault and the penal codes.

Apart from creating awareness, the University must be provided evidence to initiate legal action, he said adding that university girls must also be courageous to report sexual harassment, assaults and intimidation which they have experienced or which they have seen their friends experiencing. But in most cases, girls do not reveal sexual assaults or harassment, he said, adding that be that as it may, enormous awareness raising activities are undertaken to raise the awareness of girls. The influence of cultural imposition on victim girls in not revealing assaults is high. And he insisted that students must not compromise their academic goals whatsoever.

Asked about why girls are lured into blind dating, he says both economic and the manner of child upbringing can factors.

All told, hiding the hazard does not do any good to students, the university, families and the society at large. Rather it is imperative to face the challenges of university girls in the entire nation in general and in Hawassa. Families are also obliged regularly learn of the safety and conditions of their beloved daughters whom they have sent to pursue university education. University girls should not also forget all the sacrifices made by parents in rearing and educating children regardless their own lives. At last, stakeholders must show perseverance to rescue immature girls from immersing in free sexual practices of European style. This will undermine the values of the Ethiopian psyche. Thus, government offices, research institutions, religious institutions, and the entire society must apply synergies and energies to nip the hazard in the bud.

Source:ethpress.gov.et